On the Glories of Spam

It’s hardly a controversial position, but I don’t like spam. I really hate it, actually. Past email addresses eventually got so clogged that I had shut shut them down & create news just to regain sanity in my life. This approach is perhaps best called the “Slash and Burn” method.

But… you can’t deny that spam has come up with some wonderful things. Well, specifically, one: the spurious names that are appended to the “from” header. They consist of a combination of a couple of words taken randomly from the dictionary & a “middle initial”, all intended to bypass your spam filters. These random couplings sometimes beget glorious results:

• Double O Tedious (Irish, perhaps?)
• Urinate G. Coordinator (this almost sounds like a job title)
• Omens H. Absolutism
• Gunshots I. Senatorial (I’ve received this one many times over the years—perhaps these aren’t as random as I thought)
• Religiously H. Panacea (interesting combination there)
• Stultifies H. Putrescence
• Chuvash B. Residue
• Powering H. Kahlua (for the adolescent alcoholic)